[ Cale frowns. He still feels far too hot from Record, his shirt stuck to him with sweat and whatever blood he didn't manage to cough up into the bucket in arm's reach of him. It feels gross and suffocating.
— Y,you should cool yourself off! — You could clean yourself up at the same time. — Wouldn't that be nice, Cale?
He frowns some more as the Crybaby, Thief, and Super Rock all speak to him. Mostly because, yeah, it would be nice. ]
...I need to empty this bucket and wash off with cold water.
[ — That's it! Good job asking for help!
Cale does his best to ignore the Cheapskate's encouragement.
[ Viktor waits patiently, calm and unbothered by the brief silence. He can tell Cale, much like him, has had to take care of himself for a long time. It's hard to lean on support when you've gotten so used to accommodating yourself, but it's something Viktor is also learning how to navigate too.
So when he's given a task, Viktor moves to complete it without comment, having emptied the bucket before returning with the fresh water and a cloth. ]
Would you like the window open? [ Sometimes he needs fresh air when he's feeling poorly, but Viktor won't be bothered if Cale doesn't feel similarly. ]
[ Cale doesn't say 'thank you', having broken himself of the habit a while ago now, but he does acknowledge the assistance with a blink and a small nod. He is about to grab the cloth and soak it when he feels the way his shirt moves against his skin. A disgruntled expression crosses his face.
He hears Viktor's question, considers it, then says: ]
Yeah.
[ And then, with shaky fingers he sets about undoing his shirt. Across each of his collarbones there are four waterdrops that look painted on; four black on one side, two black, one grey, and one white on the other. More noticeable than those water drops, however, is what appears to be a beautiful silver shield with wings over his heart — the centre of which is obscured by a grotesque scar.
Cale is too focused on freeing himself from the sticky, clinging shirt to care about modesty. The fabric catches on some of the lustrous red scales all running down his spine. He hears one of his ancient powers snicker.
Somehow, Cale feels like he's lost a battle with his shirt. ]
[ He takes a bit longer to open the window if only to give Cale a moment to gather himself. It's clear he doesn't often let people help, and the last thing Viktor wants to do is seem overbearing or make him feel crowded. It's a balancing act for a healer, but he's hopefully done this long enough to know how to navigate all this.
So when he returns, Viktor wordlessly helps Cale peel off the shirt, careful as always not to touch his skin. Triggering a connection wouldn't exactly be helpful right now. ]
[ Fortunately Cale has had three years of experience being dressed, assisted with washing, carried around, and generally helped with nearly every self-care task on a daily basis, so nothing about this feels odd or uncomfortable to him. In fact, with his shirt now off thanks to Viktor's assistance, Cale feels much more comfortable.
He sighs heavily, then wipes one last trickle of blood from the corner of his mouth with the back of his hand. ]
Goddamn worthless body.
[ Cale actually likes this body.
Yes, it's weak like glass, but he feels more him in it than he ever did as Kim Rok Soo, even if that could just be the fault of that curse he was suffering from in his old life.
He half-heartedly pulls the ribbon from his hair, changing the style from a half-ponytail to a lazy, half-assed bun to keep his sweaty hair off his neck. ]
Her location moved a few times the past couple of days.
[ It was different from how the castle itself was constantly changing. Cale wishes he could see what was going on down in that basement with his eyes, but he was only able to 'see' through the sense of stone and limited water particles.
He soaks the cloth Viktor brought him, barely wringing excess water from it before wiping his face. Cale closes his eyes, focusing on the cool cloth on his cheek.
He remembers that time in the Directory. Cale had overheated and his friends were concerned; Eruhaben wet a towel and Ron had wiped the sweat from his forehead, then pressed it to his cheek like this while Cale had continued breathing heavily.
“…Cale-nim, I will take you outside.”
Choi Han said that. And then—
Cale cuts off the record before he gets consumed by it. He thinks instead of the dragon moving below them all. ]
...At first it felt like she was being moved. [ He cools the cloth down with fresh water, then begins applying it to his neck and shoulders. His arms are still shaky, making it difficult. ] Infrequent; overnight.
[ Cale runs through the records he has of each time he checked on the dragon over the past few days, analyzing all the movements. ]
[ Cale seems as though he's deep in thought, so Viktor doesn't disturb that, nor does he comment on the remark about his body. It's certainly a sentiment he's carried his entire life. He gets it.
When the discussion finally returns to the dragon, Viktor is listening intently, ready to address it. The movement is different now gives him pause. ]
How is it different? She moves on her own? [ He wonders about that. ]
I... [ Eyes still closed, his brows knit together in a frown. ] ...don't have enough points of data to accurately confirm.
[ It irritates him. His fingers tighten around the damp cloth. If she's moved again in the past hour he would be able to answer with certainty.
I don't feel close to fainting so it should be fine.
Cale ignores the Super Rock who is spouting out his usual scary warnings, trying to convince him not to do anything. Instead he shifts to face Viktor and gesture to the water drop markings on his collar bones. ]
How many of them are black?
[ If he has at least six left he should be fine to do another quick search. ]
You deny then that you are inflicting great pain on yourself, every day, for weeks. [ His tone is flat. He's not coddling you. ] Whether or not you can recover does not change the lengths you are going.
It's not painful, just uncomfortable. [ Cale knows pain, deeply and intimately. He has yet to experience anything he would truly consider painful in this world and he hopes it stays that way.
But Viktor is persistent. Now that Cale understands what the man is asking him he falls silent, considering how he should explain this. He leans back, shifting into a more comfortable position, and sighs.
His expression quickly turns cold and serious. ]
There was an existence that had fallen into darkness since the moment it was born. The only thing lighting up the darkness in its life was torches, and it had never even seen the light of the sun.
It was being forced to become an existence without rationality.
It had to suffer through its loneliness, without any family or anything to lean on.
It was tortured and abused every day, and was only left alone when it was barely alive.
[ Cale pauses. ]
It was only four years old.
[ There was something different about his tone as he spoke; the normal indifference feeling almost icy to start, but seems to melt away until there is an undertone of fury and sorrow.
Raon has come so far since then, and even gotten his revenge, yet Cale still hates to think about his youngest's past. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
— Y,you should cool yourself off!
— You could clean yourself up at the same time.
— Wouldn't that be nice, Cale?
He frowns some more as the Crybaby, Thief, and Super Rock all speak to him. Mostly because, yeah, it would be nice. ]
...I need to empty this bucket and wash off with cold water.
[ — That's it! Good job asking for help!
Cale does his best to ignore the Cheapskate's encouragement.
What am I? A child? ]
no subject
So when he's given a task, Viktor moves to complete it without comment, having emptied the bucket before returning with the fresh water and a cloth. ]
Would you like the window open? [ Sometimes he needs fresh air when he's feeling poorly, but Viktor won't be bothered if Cale doesn't feel similarly. ]
no subject
He hears Viktor's question, considers it, then says: ]
Yeah.
[ And then, with shaky fingers he sets about undoing his shirt. Across each of his collarbones there are four waterdrops that look painted on; four black on one side, two black, one grey, and one white on the other. More noticeable than those water drops, however, is what appears to be a beautiful silver shield with wings over his heart — the centre of which is obscured by a grotesque scar.
Cale is too focused on freeing himself from the sticky, clinging shirt to care about modesty. The fabric catches on some of the lustrous red scales all running down his spine. He hears one of his ancient powers snicker.
Somehow, Cale feels like he's lost a battle with his shirt. ]
...I'm stuck.
no subject
So when he returns, Viktor wordlessly helps Cale peel off the shirt, careful as always not to touch his skin. Triggering a connection wouldn't exactly be helpful right now. ]
no subject
He sighs heavily, then wipes one last trickle of blood from the corner of his mouth with the back of his hand. ]
Goddamn worthless body.
[ Cale actually likes this body.
Yes, it's weak like glass, but he feels more him in it than he ever did as Kim Rok Soo, even if that could just be the fault of that curse he was suffering from in his old life.
He half-heartedly pulls the ribbon from his hair, changing the style from a half-ponytail to a lazy, half-assed bun to keep his sweaty hair off his neck. ]
Her location moved a few times the past couple of days.
[ It was different from how the castle itself was constantly changing. Cale wishes he could see what was going on down in that basement with his eyes, but he was only able to 'see' through the sense of stone and limited water particles.
He soaks the cloth Viktor brought him, barely wringing excess water from it before wiping his face. Cale closes his eyes, focusing on the cool cloth on his cheek.
He remembers that time in the Directory. Cale had overheated and his friends were concerned; Eruhaben wet a towel and Ron had wiped the sweat from his forehead, then pressed it to his cheek like this while Cale had continued breathing heavily.
“…Cale-nim, I will take you outside.”
Choi Han said that. And then—
Cale cuts off the record before he gets consumed by it. He thinks instead of the dragon moving below them all. ]
...At first it felt like she was being moved. [ He cools the cloth down with fresh water, then begins applying it to his neck and shoulders. His arms are still shaky, making it difficult. ] Infrequent; overnight.
[ Cale runs through the records he has of each time he checked on the dragon over the past few days, analyzing all the movements. ]
The movement is different now.
no subject
When the discussion finally returns to the dragon, Viktor is listening intently, ready to address it. The movement is different now gives him pause. ]
How is it different? She moves on her own? [ He wonders about that. ]
no subject
[ It irritates him. His fingers tighten around the damp cloth. If she's moved again in the past hour he would be able to answer with certainty.
I don't feel close to fainting so it should be fine.
Cale ignores the Super Rock who is spouting out his usual scary warnings, trying to convince him not to do anything. Instead he shifts to face Viktor and gesture to the water drop markings on his collar bones. ]
How many of them are black?
[ If he has at least six left he should be fine to do another quick search. ]
no subject
Why is this so important to you?
no subject
...It's not? It's just more convenient if you tell me?
no subject
You are willing to risk your own life to find this dragon. [ He tilts his head a little, staring at him. ] Why?
no subject
no subject
So I ask again. Why?
cw: mention of abuse/torture
But Viktor is persistent. Now that Cale understands what the man is asking him he falls silent, considering how he should explain this. He leans back, shifting into a more comfortable position, and sighs.
His expression quickly turns cold and serious. ]
There was an existence that had fallen into darkness since the moment it was born. The only thing lighting up the darkness in its life was torches, and it had never even seen the light of the sun.
It was being forced to become an existence without rationality.
It had to suffer through its loneliness, without any family or anything to lean on.
It was tortured and abused every day, and was only left alone when it was barely alive.
[ Cale pauses. ]
It was only four years old.
[ There was something different about his tone as he spoke; the normal indifference feeling almost icy to start, but seems to melt away until there is an undertone of fury and sorrow.
Raon has come so far since then, and even gotten his revenge, yet Cale still hates to think about his youngest's past. ]
That existence is my son.