Sometimes, Viktor missed those days. More often, he felt mortified by what he'd become — a shadow of his former self, constantly fighting exhaustion and pain just to function. But slowly, day by day, Viktor was healing those old perceptions of himself like scars that simply needed time. It helped that Jayce never treated him differently. Not once, not for a single moment, and that certainty had always filled him with confidence and hope.
It was with that feeling that Viktor sat comfortably on the ground now, reaching to hold Jayce's hands. "It's nothing but it's something," he teased, a gentle smile tugging at his mouth. "Do you want to wait?" There was no judgment in his voice, no pressure. Jayce could share whatever he wanted to whenever he felt comfortable to do it. Viktor brushed his fingers over his partner's knuckles to reaffirm that fact.
Both of them had changed. There were times Jayce barely recognized himself anymore, the lines on his face that aged him, the scars that twisted over his body, the aches and pains he had slowly learned to live with all adding up into a man who was a stranger when Jayce would catch him in the mirror or on the surface of the lake. Jayce had done terrible things and made horrible choices, and sometimes he wondered if anything he used to think about himself was ever true. And then he looked at Viktor, saw the way he looked at him, and in those moments, Jayce felt like the same man who had sat in the rubble of his apartment with a dream and hope, seeing the world through the eyes of someone who saw him, really saw him for the first time.
If Viktor could still see that man, then Jayce wouldn't give up trying to find him, too.
"It's everything," Jayce added, laughing softly and grasping his partner's hands the instant they slipped into his own. "I've waited too long already." And he sighed, shaking his head with a smile pulling at the corners of his mouth. "But I've never been more sure of anything, Viktor. I'm here because of you. You've saved my life a thousand times, you've made it better than I ever thought it'd be." Lifting his eyes, he held Viktor's, watching the colors change as he spoke and freeing one hand to dig for the box sitting in his pocket. "I thought the only dream I'd ever have was bringing magic to the world, but I started dreaming a new one the day we met," he continued, holding the box out in his palm, propped open now so Viktor could see the ring nestled in the swath of red velvet. "You're my dream, Viktor. You're... everything."
Swallowing hard around the nerves wrapping around his throat, he inhaled slowly. "Viktor, will you marry me?"
Viktor wasn't particularly surprised by any of this. Jayce had always been so free with his affections, and while they had grown apart in recent years, he never wondered if his partner cared for him or not. He knew he did — in every touch, every look, every gesture large and small. This was the man he'd imagined spending the rest of his life with, even if that time was limited. So when Jayce spoke, Viktor smiled, indulgent, eyes shifting from a light pink to a deep magenta as he gazed up at the man he adored. "We saved each other," he amended, prodding at the center of Jayce's chest, both teasing and quite serious. He wouldn't be alive now if it wasn't for his partner. Neither of them would be, truthfully.
It took a moment for him to register what was happening, though. Despite the direction this conversation was taking, despite the small box, despite — well, all logic, Viktor truly hadn't been anticipating this. There hadn't been any time to consider the possibility before it was here, and he inhaled a sharp breath, eyes wide, staring in disbelief as the ring was revealed. There was no mistaking the joy on his face, because it cracked and wavered, tears coming fast as he blinked them away, a laugh in his throat.
He might have knocked their teeth together a little in his surge forward to kiss Jayce stupid. Somewhere between the laughter, and the crying, and the kissing, he managed, "Of course I'll marry you," but his arms were around Jayce's neck and he was pulling him down again to meet him, so really, the words of affirmation were hardly needed. Still, he added, "Ridiculous man," in a voice so fond and full of warmth it spoke volumes, too.
As friendly as he might have seemed, Jayce was from from open with his feelings though Viktor had always seen right through him starting on the day they met. Maybe it was because Viktor had seen him at his lowest and kept looking, or maybe it was because they were so alike in so many ways, or maybe it was just because they were always meant to find each other, destined to, but Viktor had always sat behind the walls Jayce had erected to hide behind, one of the few who ever got to see the man he was beneath all the gold polish and forced smiles. So he was free with his affections, but really only to those he'd already decided were more than worth the risk and to him, Viktor always had been.
"We saved each other," Jayce echoed, catching that hand and bringing it up to press his cheek into that palm. Nuzzling it, he exhaled softly, feeling more of his nervousness evaporate into the twilight colors that washed over them.
And he watched Viktor's eyes, the gentle shift of shades, and even with all that had changed, he could still see the way his mind worked behind them as realization dawned over him. It wasn't often that Jayce could surprise his partner, and he was amused to see it so plainly on his face, in every inch of him, all his body language.
Laughing into that kiss, Jayce settled the box in his lap to reach up and hold Viktor's face in his large, calloused hands. Putty in Viktor's he moved where he was directed, arms wrapping around his waist and pulling him forward. "You're marrying me," he quipped, tugging him even closer. "So if I'm ridiculous, what does that make you?" Jayce stole another kiss before adding, "Besides incredibly lucky."
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It was with that feeling that Viktor sat comfortably on the ground now, reaching to hold Jayce's hands. "It's nothing but it's something," he teased, a gentle smile tugging at his mouth. "Do you want to wait?" There was no judgment in his voice, no pressure. Jayce could share whatever he wanted to whenever he felt comfortable to do it. Viktor brushed his fingers over his partner's knuckles to reaffirm that fact.
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If Viktor could still see that man, then Jayce wouldn't give up trying to find him, too.
"It's everything," Jayce added, laughing softly and grasping his partner's hands the instant they slipped into his own. "I've waited too long already." And he sighed, shaking his head with a smile pulling at the corners of his mouth. "But I've never been more sure of anything, Viktor. I'm here because of you. You've saved my life a thousand times, you've made it better than I ever thought it'd be." Lifting his eyes, he held Viktor's, watching the colors change as he spoke and freeing one hand to dig for the box sitting in his pocket. "I thought the only dream I'd ever have was bringing magic to the world, but I started dreaming a new one the day we met," he continued, holding the box out in his palm, propped open now so Viktor could see the ring nestled in the swath of red velvet. "You're my dream, Viktor. You're... everything."
Swallowing hard around the nerves wrapping around his throat, he inhaled slowly. "Viktor, will you marry me?"
no subject
It took a moment for him to register what was happening, though. Despite the direction this conversation was taking, despite the small box, despite — well, all logic, Viktor truly hadn't been anticipating this. There hadn't been any time to consider the possibility before it was here, and he inhaled a sharp breath, eyes wide, staring in disbelief as the ring was revealed. There was no mistaking the joy on his face, because it cracked and wavered, tears coming fast as he blinked them away, a laugh in his throat.
He might have knocked their teeth together a little in his surge forward to kiss Jayce stupid. Somewhere between the laughter, and the crying, and the kissing, he managed, "Of course I'll marry you," but his arms were around Jayce's neck and he was pulling him down again to meet him, so really, the words of affirmation were hardly needed. Still, he added, "Ridiculous man," in a voice so fond and full of warmth it spoke volumes, too.
no subject
"We saved each other," Jayce echoed, catching that hand and bringing it up to press his cheek into that palm. Nuzzling it, he exhaled softly, feeling more of his nervousness evaporate into the twilight colors that washed over them.
And he watched Viktor's eyes, the gentle shift of shades, and even with all that had changed, he could still see the way his mind worked behind them as realization dawned over him. It wasn't often that Jayce could surprise his partner, and he was amused to see it so plainly on his face, in every inch of him, all his body language.
Laughing into that kiss, Jayce settled the box in his lap to reach up and hold Viktor's face in his large, calloused hands. Putty in Viktor's he moved where he was directed, arms wrapping around his waist and pulling him forward. "You're marrying me," he quipped, tugging him even closer. "So if I'm ridiculous, what does that make you?" Jayce stole another kiss before adding, "Besides incredibly lucky."